There are many things that we want and that we work extremely hard for. You can work hard to acquire things or to achieve success. That’s just how life is. Going from one thing to another, taking on one challenge at a time, and all the while wanting to achieve more.
We can achieve much when we put our hearts and minds to it, however, there are only a few things that truly matter. The 3 things that are easier to achieve than to recover from are trust, respect and integrity. The things that truly matter to each of us. The intrinsic values of these 3 areas are worth so much more than any success because the truth is success does not help you achieve trust, respect and integrity but it is because of trust, respect, and integrity that you are able to achieve success and walk the everyday with your head held high.
Let’s break it down.
Trust.
Trust is fundamental to everything that we do and it is a reflection of how dependable, reliable, and committed we are to what we say and do. Trust is built over time and through various situations. There are various types of trust such as rules-based trust. For example, you experience rules-based trust when you are driving a car. You trust that the other drivers are going to follow the rules. For example, you trust that when the traffic lights turn red, the drivers will stop. You trust that the double lines on the road will ensure that drivers on the other side of the road does not come into your lane.
The trust that comes from relationships is different. Trust that exist between people are different. The way people relate, share and work together is not based on rules to follow but it is earned or achieved based on how you behave. It is based on how you live your life, doing what you say you will do, being consistent in what you do, how you make decisions and how you respond in various situations and circumstances. This type of trust takes times for you to build and achieve.
Trust is a fundamental value that must exist in your workplace and personal life. No relationship can be built without trust. Be careful how you protect and nurture your trustworthiness with those around you. Trust is earned through time and through shared experiences. However, it can be lost or broken in an instance.
Now imagine a situation when that trust is broken. It might start with a little white lie and that grows to a bigger and ultimately into a significant lie, the trust that was established over years will come crumbling down in an instance. In some situations, it is lost forever, and trust can never be recovered.
Respect
We all want respect and to a certain extend we are all granted a basic level of respect for just being a person. However, the respect that we all work for, is from others based on our reputation, effort and achievements. Respect is also given based on position or title but to keep that respect is to align the perception of the position or title with your actions and behaviours.
For example, you could be the leader of a team. The base level respect that would be afforded to you would be one of a leader and the authority that comes with that position. If your performance as a leader equates and reflects the position, then you are able to maintain the level of respect. If you exceed the expectations, then the respect that you gained will exceed the initial level. We all know that as a leader, everyone is watching you and depending on how you walk the talk, that level of respect will either grow or decline accordingly.
The moment you have the respect of others, a few other values are afforded to you and one of them is as the above, trust. It is harder to regain or recover your reputation after a fall. There are many public figures who have fallen from grace, the first two values to go out with them are respect and trust.
You can lose the respect of the people around you with your words and actions. Just like trust, once you have lost the respect of people, it will take a lot more effort to regain it than to earn it in the first place.
Integrity
Integrity is not just about being honest. It is about a consistent life both in private and in public. These 2 aspects of your life must be aligned. You are authentic and genuine with not just what you say, think, feel but act. It is not about doing the right thing only in front for people to see. It is about living according to your values no matter the circumstances and potential cost to you. Integrity consists of the two values that we have covered, trust and respect.
Just like trust and respect, it is extremely hard to gain integrity and once it is lost, it is very hard to recover it back. I am sure that you have heard the saying, “hard work and talent can get you to the top, but integrity helps you to stay at the top.”
I am sure that you have encountered various people in your life or read about the public figures and their lack of integrity and what that does not only to the person but to those around them.
The truth is that what you work for your whole life for is not about achieving goals or gaining financial success, it is about building your reputation which is based on trust, respect and integrity. You might work your whole life to build trust, respect and integrity and if you are not careful, it can be lost in an instance. The saddest part of these three values is that when it is lost or broken, for you to recover them is way harder that achieving them in the first place.
Thank you for taking the time to read to my article. I hope that you have learned at least one thing that you are able to apply into your everyday life. As always, please subscribe, follow and share this podcast with your friends. Take care and step into the everyday with purpose.
Lisa Lam : Coach | Trainer | Consultant 