Have you ever noticed how some people are simply happy and calm through any situation while some are not? Which camp do you fall into? Are you the happy camper or the “I-am-happy-when-i-am-miserable” category?
I like to think that all of us want to be happy and content. Truth be told we can’t be happy all the time but at least most of the time. Have you wondered why some people are just happy? In fact, they rather annoy you with their happiness. What makes a person happy? What does happiness consist off? What will contribute to happiness? What does not contribute to happiness?
When it comes down to it, happiness is a personal choice. It is made up of sub-conscious decisions that we make. Some might call it personality or attitude. Small decisions or practices over time makes a habit. Habit over time becomes an automatic action. How we choose to respond to a situation will determine the outcome of either finding a silver lining or just more misery.
Let’s explore the top 5 areas that robs you of your happiness.
- Being upset about the small stuff: Every little thing that does not go your way gets you all upset. When things or people don’t go your way, it upsets you. It takes you days or even weeks to get over it. Imagine the amount of time that you have wasted being upset instead of being happy. Every time you are upset simply means that you are stealing your “happy time”. We all know the importance of time, hence why would you waste time to be upset? Don’t sweat the small stuff. It is true. Don’t waste your time and energy. Decide to move forward and choose to find the silver lining and be thankful. Be thankful and grateful is the first step in being happy. Some days, I have just thankful to be physically fit and healthy. When there is nothing else to be grateful for, there is still your life to be thankful for. What is the alternative?
- Caring what other people think of you: The most dangerous happiness stealer is the expectations of others. It is important that we care about and for people. It is however not important what other people think of you. Why is that? In the end, the only person that must meet up to your expectation is you. You cannot truly know what someone else is thinking much less what they are thinking about you. Humans are in general self-absorb which generally means that we think more about ourselves than others. Therefore, when someone is thinking or talking about you, it usually means that they are avoiding making the improvements on themselves. When one finger points at another, remember there are three other fingers pointing back at you.
- Fear of stepping out: Fear stops you from doing what you should do. Fear stops you from feeling happy. There are some people who are afraid of being happy as they fear that something bad will happen. They feel that they are not entitled to happiness. That is clearly not true. Each of us has the power to choose to be happy. Don’t let fear rob you from your happiness.
- Control: The need to control people and situations are around you will just drive you mental. If you can’t even control yourself, what hope is there to control others. Let go of the need to control and you will find that just letting people be who they are, accepting people for their beauty and flaws will go so much better.
- Perfection: Perfection does not exist. Waiting for perfect before you can be happy is a sure way to be unhappy. Perfection robs you of all forms of happiness. How can someone be happy living in this imperfect world? Well, it’s simple, just accept that perfect does not exist. Take everything and everyone that comes by your way as a blessing and a journey of discovery and growth.
Happiness exist in how you respond with thankfulness and gratitude. At the heart of happiness is gratitude. When we are thankful, you will appreciate every thing small or big as a gift. We take so many things for granted. For example, clean water, how precious is that? Are we thankful that we have clean water to drink? There are millions of people who do not have clean water. What about the air we breathe? Just being able to breathe is to be grateful for. Don’t always focus on the “big” things and believe that those will bring about happiness. It is the small stuff that without it, the big stuff won’t exist. I have a gratitude journal and some days I don’t have anything to write until I realise that just being healthy is a point to be thankful for.
The 3 simple keys to happiness:
- Be Grateful and Not take people or things for granted.
- Be who God made you to be and NOT someone else.
- Be a giver and not a taker.
Happiness is a choice and a decision that we make. Don’t allow the “happiness robbers” to steal your happiness without a fight.
Lisa Lam : Coach | Trainer | Consultant 